Also, I'm not going to be posting on Saturdays. My Saturdays are way too hectic without my downtime at work to write, so its going to be my day off instead.
As a final little pre-thought, this one is specifically for my lovely friends on TINDER! Yes, I have a Tinder. No, I am not ashamed. For anyone reading from there, I am Nikki and Brittany. This is something I think I might actually address in a later post, but for the very short while I was up at Brigham Young University - Idaho, I had decided I wanted to become a completely new person in college and I started going by Nikki instead. When I moved back here to Utah where I grew up though, everyone already knew me as Brittany and I simply gave up on trying to go by my middle name instead. Now you can all stop asking me about that. (;
Now that that's out of the way...
These posts are mostly just going to be me letting the world know how much of an idiot I am, and every once in a while you might hear about how much of an idiot everyone else is as well. You may not appreciate my ridiculous stories, and that's fine. I'm going to share them anyway and pretend that some people do!
So um. Redundancy. Way back in junior high, I was walking into school in the morning when I saw a girl walk up to someone I assumed was her boyfriend, and she yelled at him "FOR YOUR FYI..." At this point in my life, I have no idea what she said after that. All I could think was "for your for your information!" and I laughed to myself at her stupidity.
I'm sure she's a very intelligent person. We all have our idiotic moments.
Take one of mine for example. So I work a lot, debatably too much. Before I started working my current full time job, I knew that I would have a work schedule of 8 am to 8 pm every weekday in the very near future, so I filled my schedule with as many dates as I could possibly manage knowing my social life would soon die. I had a lunch date scheduled with a guy one day right after my part time morning job, and that morning I was running late so I had failed to eat breakfast. Thanks to that, I was starving by the time I got home from work, and I decided I was going to attempt to eat a hard boiled egg before my date showed up.
With my luck being the way it is, I was really struggling with this egg. Every little tiny piece of shell refused to let go of the egg it surrounded and my peeling process became borderline violent as I attempt to get this done before my date. Although I did eventually get all of the shell (and part of the outer layer of the egg) off, I'd say the egg won this war. The doorbell rang as soon as I ripped off the last bit.
I was so hungry, and I had already gone through the over-the-top pain of peeling the egg, so in a panic I shoved the entire thing in my mouth and ran in a circle around the kitchen and living room in a panic. Don't ask me why I thought this was a good idea.
It probably wasn't even that long of a period of time that my date was waiting, but it felt like forever and I was in a state of almost hysteria over the situation I had gotten myself into. So, I did what any reasonable human being would do in my situation.
I attempted to swallow the egg whole.
I couldn't breathe anymore. Go figure. I was choking and I swear my life flashed before my eyes. I opened the door to greet my date while gasping for breath and coughing up a storm. Everything was a blur after that as I attempted to both keep my life and not die by egg, as well as greet my date and not keep him waiting. Really, I don't know why this kid put up with me. I proceeded to choke on that little devil of an egg all the way to where we were going for lunch. He probably should have dumped me on the side of the road in recognition that I am uncivilized swine.
Anyway, the moral of the story is, I panic way too much over trying to do everything right regarding dates and sometimes I need to just chill before I die by egg.
I'll save the rest of my stupidity for later TGIF posts. Aren't you excited?
Have a wonderful weekend, all!
♥//Brittany
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